Tag: COVID-19

News

New CDC Data Reveals Only 6% Of Egyptians Actually Died From Moses’ 10 Plagues

After reviewing some data in their spare time, officials at the Center for Disease Control have revealed some interesting results. According to the data and announcement, it seems as though most Egyptians had other preexisting conditions when afflicted by Moses’ 10 plagues. Most Egyptian citizens suffered from things like dysentery, tuberculosis and cholera in addition to locusts, boils, and the Angel of Death. CDC officials … Continue reading New CDC Data Reveals Only 6% Of Egyptians Actually Died From Moses’ 10 Plagues

Liz Lemon
WAP Clean Version
Life

Local Stake Dance DJ Makes “Clean” Version of Cardi B’s WAP That is 41 Seconds Long

Terrance Drake grew up in Sandy, Utah. In his youth, he wanted to be a famous DJ. Unfortunately, life had different plans; so, Terrance lives his dream vicariously by being a DJ for local stake and ward dances. “It’s really fun,” said Terrance in a 2019 interview, “I pride myself on my ability to bring today’s best songs to our youth appropriately.” Terrance is known … Continue reading Local Stake Dance DJ Makes “Clean” Version of Cardi B’s WAP That is 41 Seconds Long

James West
News

Provo insists bad air quality is a government hoax

The air quality in Utah was thought to have gotten worse from recent fires, but Provo residents insist on the idea that the poor air quality is simply another hoax, much like COVID-19. “We all know that social distancing doesn’t do anything,” said Jared Wright, a BYU student studying environmental science. “The reason why the air was thought to be bad was because the government … Continue reading Provo insists bad air quality is a government hoax

Gail Black
Campus

BYU announces campus shutdown to begin this weekend

The number of COVID-19 cases have been rising despite the promises students made to be safe, smart, and to follow the regulations that had been set. Because of the recent outbreaks, BYU has just announced their decision to switch fully to remote learning. “It’s really sad that we have to do this,” said Karen Winters, BYU coronavirus specialist. “We were hopeful that we would be … Continue reading BYU announces campus shutdown to begin this weekend

Gail Black
Manspread
Campus

BYU Student Thanks Pandemic for Allowing Him to “Manspread”

McCabe McKellar, a 21 year-old BYU student, posted a video tribute to COVID-19 on Instagram earlier today. In the tribute he thanked COVID-19 and the global pandemic for allowing him to manspread anywhere he goes. He said that this crisis has changed his life for the better: “So many new opportunities have opened up for me! I can manspread on the bus, at airports, and … Continue reading BYU Student Thanks Pandemic for Allowing Him to “Manspread”

Cameron Frye