Tag: Campus

Campus, Featured

BYU student dies after purposely contracting leprosy to “stand apart from the COVID crowd”

“This is why I flooded the Earth guys…Do I need to do it again?” – God, probably Just like the guy who doesn’t realize the party has ended and as clearly overstayed his welcome, COVID has once again run rampant across the United States. The new Omicron variant has revived COVID from the ashes and now it has its eyes set on infecting every single person … Continue reading BYU student dies after purposely contracting leprosy to “stand apart from the COVID crowd”

Bobby Zimmeruski
Campus, Featured

Student wakes up just in time for finals after hitting snooze button on first day of classes

We all fall victim to the notorious snooze bottom every once and awhile. Some of us, a little too often. One student decided to press his luck a little too far. On the first day of classes, Denzel Von Shrouttenbottom was woken up abruptly for his 7:00 am yoga class by his alarm. The sweet sound of “Welcome to the Black Parade” by My Chemical … Continue reading Student wakes up just in time for finals after hitting snooze button on first day of classes

Bobby Zimmeruski
Featured

Opinion: The Umbrella Thing Was Very Cool and Based Actually

BYU student John Bell, also known as @thedanitebowieknife on Twitter, shared his thoughts on Color the Campus, and surrounding events that took place yesterday.  “Not that I pay attention to these things, but it feels like wearing clothes with a clear political agenda doesn’t have a place on campus.” he added that “BYU is supposed to be a safe space for members, but stuff like … Continue reading Opinion: The Umbrella Thing Was Very Cool and Based Actually

Albert Camus
Campus

Plandemic: Helaman Halls Coronavirus Outbreak Faked By Freshman Trying to Avoid Call to Relief Society Presidency

Helaman Halls resident Julia Graves, 18, has admitted to faking a case of the novel coronavirus to avoid getting called as Relief Society President in her new ward. As the result of her self-described “small fib,” the entire third floor of David John Hall was quarantined for fourteen days. “As a 5’9” blonde from Mesa who exclusively wears Piper & Scoot, I knew my risk … Continue reading Plandemic: Helaman Halls Coronavirus Outbreak Faked By Freshman Trying to Avoid Call to Relief Society Presidency

Emil Ratburn III
Campus

BYU’s Testing Center Repurposed as COVID Testing Center for Fall Semester

This upcoming semester the testing center will no longer be administering academic tests as it has done since 1982. The building will see radical changes as it converts to accommodate testing the entire student body for coronavirus three times a week for the duration of semester. Results will be given within three days of testing. Late fees will still be given to those that don’t … Continue reading BYU’s Testing Center Repurposed as COVID Testing Center for Fall Semester

Art Vandelay