Category: News

Life, News, Provo

Deseret Book Announces Lonely Ghost Collaboration

Deseret Book has officially announced the release of a spiritually centered Lonely Ghost spring collection. Holy Hipsters everywhere are practically foaming at the mouth. All is lonely in Zion! The Christian indie folk of Provo are absolutely thrilled for the Seagull Book x Lonely Gost spring collection.  “This launch is really going to be great for Love, Share, Invite,” says brand representative and ward mission … Continue reading Deseret Book Announces Lonely Ghost Collaboration

Marceline Abadeer1 Comment
Featured, Life, News, Uncategorized

FSY Album Snubbed At 2024 Grammy Awards

The 66th Annual Grammy Awards were held tonight in Los Angeles, California. The 2023 For the Strength of Youth Album, I Can Do All Things Through Christ, was anticipated to win big this year, but fans were left disappointed. Album of the year went, for the fourth time, to Taylor Swift for Midnights. “Of course we’re disappointed,” said Nik Day, a seasoned musician who collaborated … Continue reading FSY Album Snubbed At 2024 Grammy Awards

Barbie
News

Lonely Man Brings Back Scratcher to Sacrament Meeting

The back scratching phenomenon is one of the most fascinating nuances of Utah’s unique cultural landscape. Walk into any YSA sacrament meeting and you’ll see dozens of young women scratching their boyfriend’s backs. Is this a show of affection? Are they marking their territory? Are half the men in Provo plagued with some mysterious itchy rash? Driven by curiosity, one lonely young man decided to … Continue reading Lonely Man Brings Back Scratcher to Sacrament Meeting

Anya Forger
News

Devastating! She’s Just Using You For Your Ikon Pass

Once the snow melts, Utah therapists are flooded with thousands of heartbroken young skiers. Cuffing season ends and dumping season begins when dating an Ikon Pass holder becomes less important than securing an invite to Lake Powell. If you hold an Ikon Pass, please read the following cautionary tales to prevent emotional turmoil in the spring.  “I can’t believe I fell for the slut strands … Continue reading Devastating! She’s Just Using You For Your Ikon Pass

Anya Forger
Featured, News

Professor Who Bible Swears Kind of Pushing It Today

The Alternate Universe is dedicated to delivering the most accurate news to the people of Provo. So when our informants told us about a section of American Heritage with a waitlist of 127 students, we knew we had to do some investigative journalism. After just a few minutes in the lecture hall, an undercover AU reporter discovered the reason for the section’s popularity: Dr. Patrick … Continue reading Professor Who Bible Swears Kind of Pushing It Today

Anya Forger