Category: Life

Campus, Life

Mitt Romney Stepping Down From Senate to Teach American Heritage

After serving a single term in the U.S. Senate, Mitt Romney will not seek reelection and will instead teach American Heritage at BYU. The 76-year-old Senator from Utah is on record saying he is “done will all that political Shiz” and that he would “train the new generation of leaders” in exchange for unlimited chocolate milk. Many factors reportedly went into the decision. Romney would … Continue reading Mitt Romney Stepping Down From Senate to Teach American Heritage

Cameron Frye
Featured, Life, missionary, Provo, Sports

Chase Roberts To Replace Angel Moroni on Provo Temple

Following the BYU football team’s nail biter victory against Arkansas, the First Presidency put out a statement to the press. “Considering his angelic athleticism and heroic one-handed catch on Saturday, it has been determined that a statue of Chase Roberts will replace the Angel Moroni on the remodeled Provo Temple.” Noted football fan Dallin H. Oaks further commented: “We were promised that we would see … Continue reading Chase Roberts To Replace Angel Moroni on Provo Temple

Paul Atreides1 Comment
Life, News

Guest List Revealed for Russell M. Nelson’s 99th Birthday Party

Over the weekend, President Russell M. Nelson celebrated his 99th birthday. He hosted a birthday party on Saturday night in the Conference Center, and The Alternate Universe obtained a copy of the guest list. Attendees included a number of celebrities and all 347 of Nelson’s descendants. Performances by Bad Bunny, Harry Styles, and Ice Spice got everybody dancing throughout the birthday bash. Russ himself even joined … Continue reading Guest List Revealed for Russell M. Nelson’s 99th Birthday Party

Cameron Frye
Campus, Life

BYU Announces Devotional Lineup for Fall Semester 2023

Every Tuesday at 11:05 a.m., students, faculty, staff and the greater BYU community attend the weekly devotional or forum address at the Marriott Center. Most devotionals and forums will be broadcast live on BYUtv, BYUtv.org (and archived for on-demand streaming), KBYU-TV 11, Classical 89 FM and BYUradio and will be archived on speeches.byu.edu. Please plan to join with students and employees each Tuesday at 11:05 … Continue reading BYU Announces Devotional Lineup for Fall Semester 2023

Renesmee
Life

BYU Students Suspect Their Roommate is Bigfoot

Every semester, the students who dwell in the Greater Provo Metropolitan Area must grow accustomed to new classes, roommates, apartments, and suspicious smells. For at least four students in [redacted] Apartments (a Redstone property), the new sights, sounds, and tastes of their apartment included the local cryptid–their roommate. Or at least, what they assume to be their roommate. Jaryn Wylson, a sophomore at BYU, was … Continue reading BYU Students Suspect Their Roommate is Bigfoot

Paul Atreides