In the Sunday afternoon session of the April 2025 General Conference, President Russell M. Nelson announced the construction of 12 new temples in locations that span the globe–and beyond. Continue reading Church Announces New Temples
Local man Jordan P. Jensen is in critical condition after redistributing segments of this weekend’s LDS General Conference broadcast without written consent — an act which, according to ancient legal scrolls, shattered a sacred copyright seal and summoned the long dormant fury of Bonneville Distribution. The broadcast, which begins with the famous warning, “This broadcast is furnished as a public service by Bonneville Distribution. Any … Continue reading Heinous Criminal Redistributes Conference Broadcast, Struck Down
It was but a touch. A brush, really. And yet, it was everything. As the organ duo performed at a session of General Conference earlier today, they suddenly found themselves in unfamiliar territory. Until that fateful moment, their job had been simple: play the organ. Caress that console and create the sweet melodies that would be heard by millions around the world. They were good … Continue reading A Silent Exchange Between the General Conference Organists
General Conference weekend is a great learning opportunity, but you can’t be expected to catch everything. Luckily, while you were passed out on the couch, we were taking note of every action that no longer aligns with Church standards. Eating Tomatoes We were all expecting this one, but it’s still worth mentioning–tomatoes are officially of the devil. Nothing we can do about it. Using a … Continue reading New Sins You Missed at General Conference
At the conclusion of the October 2024 General Conference, President Russell M. Nelson took to the pulpit and announced eight new temples to be built in coming years. He was met with cheers, hollers, and chants of “NEL-SON, NEL-SON, NEL-SON” from the Conference Center audience. These houses of worship will bring blessings to members all over the world—and multiverse. See the list below. Continue reading Church Announces New Temples at General Conference
