Author: Warren Dusenberry

Warren is a skilled taxidermist and has over 10 years of experience designing farmhouse lofts. He got his start in writing in the early 1950s, and never quite figured it out. Catch him in his spare time going through other people's mail and fertilizing his expansive vegetable garden.
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New Art Requirements For Chapels – What Do You Think?

A recently released letter from the First Presidency provides a specific selection of Christ-centered paintings for chapel foyers and entryways. What do you think? “I’m glad they included one painting with racially diverse subjects. Two would have been way too many.” MaKarlenzleigh White – Youngliving Scientist  “This is bad news for my Judas portrait side hustle.” John Trayter – Men’s Chorus Waterboy “This is the … Continue reading New Art Requirements For Chapels – What Do You Think?

Warren Dusenberry
Campus, News

BYU Waiting for Cosmo to Emerge from Burrow, See Own Shadow Before Declaring Virtual Fall Semester

While many universities have already made the decision as to whether they will open up campus again Fall semester, BYU continues to keep students in limbo. In a recent letter to the student body, BYU administrators explained that they are unable to make the official determination that classes will continue online unless Cosmo crawls out of his burrow and recognizes his own shadow. Continue reading BYU Waiting for Cosmo to Emerge from Burrow, See Own Shadow Before Declaring Virtual Fall Semester

Warren Dusenberry
Temple sealers
News

Elite Temple Sealers Awakened from Cryo Sleep to Staff Limited Temple Reopenings

Since Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints announced that 17 temples would be reopening for live sealings this month, General Authorities quickly issued the call to awaken two dozen sealers who had been frozen at the start of the pandemic. Sources confirm they represent an elite force of priesthood holders who can confidently perform sealings without fear of becoming infected. “When … Continue reading Elite Temple Sealers Awakened from Cryo Sleep to Staff Limited Temple Reopenings

Warren Dusenberry
worthen mow lawn
Life

President Worthen Mows Lawn for 4th Time This Week

With the virtual Spring term well underway and nothing to do but look out his window, sources confirm that President Kevin J. Worthen has become fixated on the state of his lawn. Neighbors have spotted him combing bushes with a hairbrush and report that he is at this very moment getting out the lawnmower to go over his front yard for the fourth time this … Continue reading President Worthen Mows Lawn for 4th Time This Week

Warren Dusenberry
Life

BYU Grad Pleased to Announce He Has Accepted Fulltime Position in Parents’ Basement

Sources confirm that Benjamin Fuller, a recently graduated BYU engineering student, was ecstatic to finish his finals and set off into the real world. In an upbeat Facebook post this morning, Fuller announced his latest career plans to immediately accept a fulltime position in his parents’ basement. “I’ll have to uproot myself and move back across the country to my parents’ house in Idaho, but … Continue reading BYU Grad Pleased to Announce He Has Accepted Fulltime Position in Parents’ Basement

Warren Dusenberry