Author: Warren Dusenberry

Warren is a skilled taxidermist and has over 10 years of experience designing farmhouse lofts. He got his start in writing in the early 1950s, and never quite figured it out. Catch him in his spare time going through other people's mail and fertilizing his expansive vegetable garden.
Campus

BYU Student-Athletes Returned to Campus Training Last Week – What Do You Think?

BYU student-athletes returned to campus on June 1 for the first time since mid-March when the university suspended all athletic events and closed facilities. What do you think? “Good. I was beginning to think athletes would be getting scholarships without putting themselves in any physical danger.” Betsy Loon – Very Enthusiastic “Have the coaches been told yet not to say anything racist?” Carter Kip – … Continue reading BYU Student-Athletes Returned to Campus Training Last Week – What Do You Think?

Warren Dusenberry
getting married soon
Life

Provo Girls Prepare Their Parents for Upcoming Weddings With All Missionaries Returning Home Early

Missionaries have been returning from all over the world, catching the attention of over 68% of the single BYU females, who have begun actively updating their Pinterest wedding boards. “I had a three-year plan for BYU that included waiting for my missionary,” said Hayeleigh Holland. “Now that my boyfriend, Raustin, has been released, I need to speed up my plans so we can get married … Continue reading Provo Girls Prepare Their Parents for Upcoming Weddings With All Missionaries Returning Home Early

Warren Dusenberry
News

Vivint Sales Bro Takes Note of Looted Businesses to Approach Next Summer

Colby Doland may have had his riveting summer of selling security systems and working out ruined by COVID-19, but he’s already set on “making bank” in 2021. Following a devastating week of protests across the nation, Colby has begun compiling a list of all businesses that have been looted or damaged in any way. He plans on approaching each and every one with his well-rehearsed … Continue reading Vivint Sales Bro Takes Note of Looted Businesses to Approach Next Summer

Warren Dusenberry
News

‘The Spirit Goes to Bed at 8PM Tonight’ Says Governor Herbert, Issuing SLC Curfew

Following a turbulent afternoon of protests in Salt Lake City, one in which thousands gathered to demand an end to police brutality and racism, Utah’s Governor Gary Herbert issued a curfew, stating: “For the next couple days the Spirit goes to bed at 8PM instead of midnight.” “You really don’t want to be out past 8PM again until Monday.” the statement issued by the Governor’s … Continue reading ‘The Spirit Goes to Bed at 8PM Tonight’ Says Governor Herbert, Issuing SLC Curfew

Warren Dusenberry
Arby's Gap Year
Life

BYU Student Decides to Take Gap Year to ‘Find Himself’ Working at Local Arby’s

BYU Junior Jeffrey Barnes was not impressed with the way his professors have been handling his online classes. Considering an online education to no longer be worth the price of tuition, Barnes has decided to pause taking classes and instead begin working full-time at a local Arby’s where he will truly be able to learn and grow. “Why would I waste my time on Zoom … Continue reading BYU Student Decides to Take Gap Year to ‘Find Himself’ Working at Local Arby’s

Warren Dusenberry