After double-majoring in finance and textiles at BYU, McJohn Stevenson has finally fulfilled his dream of opening up a tailor shop. “I studied textiles because I figured I’d have classes with mostly girls and I could find a wife. I was correct about the demographics of my classes, but I’m still single.” “I wanted to call it Sew Bro, but that was already taken,” said … Continue reading New Tailor Shop ‘Sew King’ Opens on Center Street
In order to reach a new demographic, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints hired Michel Bay to direct a new Mormon Message. They’re not actually called Mormon Messages anymore, but did you actually know that? The inspirational video is set to star Mark Wahlberg, a Catholic, saving a Mormon, played by Kirby Heyborne, from a burning building during a robot invasion while an … Continue reading Michael Bay Directs New Mormon Message Starring Mark Wahlberg
Cosmo Cougar officially joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints this weekend. Some readers may be surprised to find out that Cosmo was not already a member, but Cosmo had never indicated either way. If not previously a member, how did Cosmo Cougar become the mascot for the Church-owned school? Cosmo has a brother, Carlo, who joined the Church and attended BYU. Cosmo … Continue reading Cosmo Gets Baptized
With the record amount of snowfall along the Wasatch Front, the possibility for flooding is dramatically higher this spring. Residents and local governments are preparing in multiple ways. One sophomore at BYU is taking a very unique approach. Noel McArkin felt compelled to construct an ark to keep himself safe from harm. “I’ve never seen this much snow during my 22 years (minus two obviously … Continue reading BYU Student Prepares for Possible Flooding by Building Ark
Kevin Worthen, president of BYU, wanted to help in the demolition of the HFAC and rented his own bulldozer. However, because Kevin rarely leaves the ASB, he did not know which building the HFAC is. He drove his bulldozer straight into the side if the WILK. After taking out a few rooms, Kevin posed for some photo ops outside to show off his work. K-dubs … Continue reading Kevin Worthen accidentally bulldozes WILK instead of HFAC
