Based on official reports out of the testing center, Brayzden Richards has set the record for the fastest midterm with a time of 22.1 seconds. He narrowly beat the previous record of 37 minutes.

Brayzden Richards explained that he didn’t even look at the test, “I was completely unprepared, so I went in with ‘When in doubt, ‘C’ it out!’” It was a true/false exam.

This will be bad news for those students preparing to set the record themselves. Throw out your hand strength stress ball, because you’ll need an actual miracle to go sub-22 seconds.

Brayzden’s best friend, Ammon McBride, witnessed the decision to take the midterm in their dorm living room. “What happened? Well, he’d had one too many Arizonas, and he slammed his can down and said ‘Shizzzz, Imma just take it right now.’” 

“He met the requirements: he used a testing center pencil and he answered every question. His score does not matter, unfortunately,” clarified Testing Center admin Phil Enthablank.

Even the Testing Center student employees were shook, and they’ve seen it all. “He managed to fit two bathroom breaks into those 22 seconds,” stated proctor Mark M. Down, looking visibly shaken. “Man’s a menace.”

His jersey will be going up in the Tester Center ceiling, replacing the one put there for the previous record holder, David A. Bednar. Elder Bednar has yet to comment.