Vexillologists and incels alike have argued that the recently implemented redesign of our state flag is far more progressive and inclusive than Brigham Young ever intended for Utah to be. And after careful examination, we’ve discovered that they are right to be outraged.

Let’s start with the obvious one. The woke mob is obsessed with including people, and in this case, they just had to include people with poor eyesight. If the flag is identifiable from more than eight feet away, it’s not the right flag for us.

The REAL flag has the word ‘industry,’ because if you rearrange the letters of ‘industry’ and then change all the letters, you get ‘American,’ which is a reference to American Express, the least woke banking company.

Next, go ahead and count the sides on the hexagon in the woke flag. That’s right–this particular hexagon has six sides. Oh, and it’s just a coincidence that the word ‘woke’ has six letters?? Yeah, right. It’s like they’re not even trying to hide it.

Let’s think of some things that rhyme with ‘woke.’ Broke, choke, oak, smoke, woke, yolk. Now read that again. Oh, look. ‘Woke’ is on that list. Checkmate, liberals.

It’s pretty clear that this “flag” follows some sort of communist agenda, otherwise there would be no need to change it. After all, the name of the state is Utah, not “Woke Utah.”