In what has now become a regular ritual, members of the Cougar Chronicle fashioned a stand upon which they climb to remind themselves and all around them that they are far superior to all other sources of campus journalism. 

In what began as a concerted effort to boost moral amongst the student-led, conservative BYU news source, the team took inspiration from the stories of the Book of Mormon and created a “holy stand” upon which to recite prayers of gratitude. This practice quickly shifted from one of gratitude to selfishness and slandering. Speculations that this was a way to nurse the group’s bruised ego after an unflattering run-in with The Black Menaces and their eager fan base have yet to be confirmed. Rumors about the Cougar Chronicle’s jealousy and indignation toward other more popular news sources around BYU campus continue to mount. 

Jacob Christensen, the student accused of following an individual around despite repeated requests to knock it off has refused to make public comment. 

The ritual prayer goes as follows:

“Holy, holy God; we believe that thou art God, and we believe that thou art holy, and that thou hast separated us from others on BYU campus. We also thank thee that thou hast elected us, that we may not be led away after the foolish traditions of the Black Menaces, which interviews and street journalism doth lead their hearts to wander far from thee. And again we thank thee, O God, that we are a chosen and trustworthy news source far superior to all others on BYU Campus. Amen.” 

Though unwilling to make public comment, the Cougar Chronicle did encourage readers to view their instagram reel that has 300 likes yet nearly 600 negative comments about their perception of their editor-in-chief’s behavior toward The Black Menaces.