We didn’t all go to primary as kids, but we’ve all heard the songs. Maybe they’re the only songs that one girl in your ward can play on the piano. Maybe your strange roommate blasts music from the Children’s Songbook and Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square at three in the morning. Maybe you went to primary as a kid, or taught primary while attending a family ward. Maybe your mission companion insisted on blaring “Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam” every time he had the aux. No matter how you heard them, we can’t escape that green book with the pioneer children on the front. Here’s what your favorite primary song says about you:
“I Am a Child of God”
Your parents only let you listen to church music on Sundays and that shaped you. You genuinely think this song is a banger and enjoy listening to the Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square (you get mad when people call them MoTab, because that’s not respectful.) You’re engaged to either an 18 year old girl or a 25 year old male RM.
“A Child’s Prayer”
You lived for that part of the song when the melodies overlapped. You did competitive choir in high school and have been to every single BYU Vocal Point concert. You also do BYU a cappella and constantly refer to your group as “the band.”
“Samuel Tells of the Baby Jesus”
You’re not like other girls, and you know it. You like how this song is in a minor key and sounds kind of spooky. You love to flex how you know this song and always mention it as your favorite Christmas hymn. You relate to Bella from Twilight but would never admit it.
“Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam”
You were a theater kid and have a short attention span. Getting up out of your seat for this song was your favorite part of church as a kid. You’re an extravert who loves Taylor Swift, and also relates to Elle Woods on a spiritual level.
“Baptism”
You were a missionary at one point and had to play this song on the piano. Now it’s forever linked to a bunch of core memories with people you’ll probably never see again. Every time you hear it, it makes you cry.
“Book of Mormon Stories”
You own a $50 journal edition of the Book of Mormon from Deseret Book and are very proud of it. You still know all the hand motions (even the problematic ones) from this song and get it stuck in your head while reading your scriptures. You’re the most annoying person in your religion class.
“The [insert any here] Article of Faith”
You had to memorize all of the Articles of Faith for some reason and these songs saved you. You randomly get them stuck in your head and also are unable to state the doctrine of Christ without singing the Fourth Article of Faith song.
“Give, Said the Little Stream”
You’re a communist now.
“Follow the Prophet”
You’re the funniest person in your friend group, and these witty one liners got you started. You came for the sick piano part and stayed for the jokes about people who don’t keep the commandments. You exclusively listen to rap music and One Direction, and you’re majoring in either psychology or business.
“Popcorn Popping”
You were annoying as a child and you’re annoying now. You relate to Sharpay in High School Musical and unironically watch Disney Channel Originals. You are not ashamed to be the main character of your life. You contribute to and even cause most of your friends’ anxiety, but you have no idea.
“I’m Glad to Pay A Tithing” and any not mentioned song
You are not the main character. You’re not even the comedic best friend or love interest. You are a background character. You have a ROC pass, love dirty soda, and are chronically single.