With the record amount of snowfall along the Wasatch Front, the possibility for flooding is dramatically higher this spring. Residents and local governments are preparing in multiple ways. One sophomore at BYU is taking a very unique approach. Noel McArkin felt compelled to construct an ark to keep himself safe from harm.

“I’ve never seen this much snow during my 22 years (minus two obviously for the mission) of living in Utah. I’m not an expert, but I’m sure this means that all of Provo will be under water by the middle of May,” claims McArkin, who has been building an ark in Rock Canyon Park for several weeks now. “Based on the blueprint I saw in my dream, it’s a hybrid between Noah’s ark and Nephi’s ship.”

Jon Johns and McCorkle Jones, current roommates and former mission companions of Noel, agree that he has lost his mind. “With all of the snow that kept us inside all winter, Noel found doomsday shows and movies on Netflix. He also started stocking our entire apartment with rice, toilet paper, and guns,” said Johns.

Last week as part of his calling, he gave the FHE lesson. He reportedly read Genesis 6:17-18 and told his FHE family that they were his sons and daughters and therefore welcome on the ark. “I’m just glad he’s letting us get on the boat. I don’t think we’re actually in danger, but better safe than sorry, you know?” said Jones.

McArkin lamented, “As Provo and its residents become more worldly, there really wasn’t any other way for things to shake out. I know Noah was told that the world would never be flooded again. but these people clearly must be punished.”

The ark is supposed to be done sometime this week, after which Noel will enter the ark for an undisclosed amount of time. It is unknown what will be done with the ark after the flooding does not carry the boat away. The leading theory is that soccer and ultimate frisbee bros will work together to dismantle it so they can use the field again.