As all current and former BYU students know, parking spots on campus are as hard to come by as a non-thirsty returned missionary. Due to the limited parking spots on campus, some students complain how they have missed classes desperately looking for a place to park. But once you hear this story, you’ll never complain again…

“My parents were kind enough to give me my brother’s old tricked Honda Civic when the school year started,” Micquellyn Johansen, victim in question, recounted to the Alternate Universe. “Little did they know, they would be the direct cause of nine straight months of suffering.”

For the past 8-months, Micquellyn Johansen has been driving aimlessly around Provo trying to find a place to park on campus. No matter how hard she tried or how hard she looked, there was never anything open.

“Right when I thought I found a spot, I would turn the corner and see someone had parked their scooter in the spot. I’ve had to sleep in my car all year. During class, I had to leave my car in Raising Cane’s drive thru so I wouldn’t be spotted. Luckily, that line moves slow enough that it worked most the time.”

Multiple eye-witness reports claim to have seen Micquellyn attempt to parallel park countless times but she was ultimately unsuccessful. She was ticketed 95 times this year for sleeping in her car and received another 589 miscellaneous traffic violations. Despite these challenges, Micquellyn was the only student in her class to receive an “A” in Mr. Kearl’s economics course.

When the news hit the press of Micquellyn’s unfortunate situation, the Alternate Universe reached out to BYU President Kevin Worthen to gather his opinion on the issue.

“I’m sadly not surprised to hear about Miss Micquellyn’s unfortunate situation,” Kevin Worthen told the Alternate Universe. “Parking has gotten so bad at BYU that I have to walk to work…if only someone could fix it.”