Ah, young love. And where is it more common than among the young single adult wards of Provo, Utah? However, despite the widespread belief that YSA wards exist solely as a matchmaking service, most wards still attempt to focus on the Savior and feeling the Spirit.

The Provo 609th ward has recently redoubled their efforts on this front and are attempting to refocus the ward. “It’s just gotten so out of hand,” says Relief Society 2nd Counselor Tayleigh Spencer. “I knew something had to change when I was handed a phone number along with the sacrament bread.”

After several strenuous and controversial ward council meetings, the 609th ward has come up with a tentative solution.

“There will be a 10 minute segment between sacrament meeting and classes where everyone can just get all the romantic tension out of their systems,” explains Bishop Ronald Howardson. “We’ll put on some nice, appropriate mingling music, and I don’t know, maybe spread some rose petals? We don’t really have to do much, these kids are so full of hormones that just singing Come, Come Ye Saints loud enough gets them feeling romantic.”

Bishop Howardson is accepting suggestions for appropriate mood music as all he has so far is Crush by David Archiuleta.