Many businesses have been known to stretch their products to the limit to create holiday specials, but Kraft’s Valentine’s Day macaroni and cheese has reached new heights of absurdity. The company is giving away 1,000 boxes of hot pink, candy flavored mac & cheese to celebrate the day of romance. One thousand lucky winners will be taking home this suspicious concoction, and two BYU students have big plans for their winnings.

“We’ve entered 70 times already,” Jared Johnsen proudly shared. “My bro Jake and I have an incredible Valentine’s date planned around this mac & cheese and we’re going to have girls falling all over us if we can win a box.” Johnsen’s roommate, Jake Jorgenson, outlined their plans for the evening: “We’ll pick the girls up and then walk back to our place. We’re going to recruit our ministering brothers to follow us sneakily as we walk and sprinkle rose petals in our general vicinity. Then we’ll impress them with our cooking skills by making the box of macaroni and fall in love over candy flavored noodles. Absolutely foolproof.”

It is rumored that the lucky girls Johnsen and Jorgenson hope to invite on this date are Analeigh Mason and Naomi Scoresby. They have a decidedly different perspective on the activity. “When I heard about the candy macaroni I thought it was fake, I couldn’t believe it when I found out it was real.” Mason said, “Who thought that would be a good idea? Candy and cheese? And that color is terrifying, it’s like on those poison dart frogs, it means stay away! If Jake and Jared win some tell them I have COVID.” Scoresby admitted that even though she thought Johnsen and Jorgenson were attractive before, the thought of candy flavored noodles ruined it for her, and she is quickly calling up every ex-boyfriend she can think of in hopes of getting engaged before the fateful evening of hot pink pasta.