President Nelson Reconsiders Age of Accountability After Great-Grandson, Age 9, Swallows Magnets For Fun

Fresh off the 190th Annual General Conference, an anonymous source from Church Headquarters reports the First Presidency is reevaluating the official age of accountability. 

The alleged discussion comes directly after President Nelson acknowledged his great-grandson’s knack of swallowing magnets, which almost landed him in the hospital last weekend. 

For years, doctors have warned parents that when ingested, magnets can clasp together and cause severe internal damage. While his great-grandson thankfully passed the magnets before such physical damages could occur, President Nelson was supposedly more concerned with the boy’s mental welfare.

Nelson was reportedly shocked to hear the nine-year-old’s explanation, “it’s just funny to feel them travel inside my belly”, given his age. 

Questionable actions like this have led many church members to wonder what an accurate age of accountability is.

Since revealed to Joseph Smith in 1831, the age of eight has been designated as the official age of accountability when children can be appropriately baptized in the Church. While this additionally determines when children can discern between right and wrong, many members today debate over possibly increasing the age.

“I’d support it,” remarked local YSA Bishop Stu Hansen. “My teen still wears a skirt over her jeans. My wife unironically enjoyed Cats last year. I’ve been rockin a phone holster since ’08. Who’s to say when we truly know right from wrong?”

While members continue to speculate a decision from the First Presidency, a change in the official age of accountability would likely not be announced until the next General Conference in April. Until then, the Church urges parents to teach their children the importance of agency in their homes and to keep magnets out of reach.