With wards in Provo meeting in person again, the members of the YSA 183 ward’s “callings committee” have seen an opportunity to create several new positions in the ward.

“I’ve invented a lot of new callings in my time,” said Holly Barnett, co-chair of the callings committee and creator of the “ward events coordinator” position, “but we really struck gold with the pandemic.”

This new callings list includes:

Social Distance Enforcer, who carries around a pool noodle to make sure everyone is leaving room “not just for the spirit, but for the whole Godhead.”

Relief Society Mask Minister, who ensures that all of the sisters have equally pretty handmade masks, so no one starts basing their self worth on their ability to sew masks.

A six-person Committee on pulpit cleaning, including two co-chairs and an events liaison. 

The ward’s bishop weighed in saying, “I hope everyone will now see how vital it is that we have their membership records up to date.” He elaborated, “What if we planned to call someone as a choir lip-syncing specialist, only to find out that they moved over the summer!”

Current estimates predict that between the new callings, and low projected turnout for the school year, the average ward member will need to hold at least three callings.