The most recent piece of art now making its home in the Harris Fine Arts Center, rows and rows of corndogs, is under attack. Last night at 12:47 pm, just after the HFAC had closed, campus security noticed an intruder in the building near the new artwork.

The figure was described as wearing a pressed grey suit with a dark blue tie, and a ski mask. They were holding a Costco sized bottle of ketchup and appeared to be trying to disfigure the artwork. Campus Police rushed to the scene to apprehend the suspect, but the vigilante had disappeared.

The aftermath of this midnight escapade left the artwork one corndog short, making the word ‘MORE’ that the corndogs spelled out now say ‘MORE’, but with a slightly disfigured ‘E’, much to the chagrin of the artist. When asked about the event, she was quoted as saying: “I just can’t believe someone would destroy such a beautiful piece of artwork! If you went to Lourve in Paris, you wouldn’t see someone trying to eat the Mona Lisa! The same standard should apply here!”

Campus Police have made further efforts to better secure the art piece, including setting up a laser barrier, and leaving uncooked eggo waffles on the ground near the art piece to distract hungry visitors and vigilantes alike.

We questioned President Kevin J. Worthen this morning about the newly added security measures to our beautiful campus. He responded: “I really don’t think this is necessary. Now could you please excuse me? I need to get this ketchup off my suit.”