Saying they were seeking a better fan experience for all students, the ROC Board announced Saturday that they will be introducing a new student section for married students ahead of tonight’s game at LaVell Edwards Stadium against Boise State.
“We’ve always wanted to provide the best possible experience for our fans from all demographics, and this new section will allow all married students to sit together, separating them from their more fun, more excitable single counterparts,” said Mason Sutterfield, president of the ROC Board.
The section will be located in the upper bowl on the northeast side of the stadium, which BYU athletic director Tom Holmoe confirmed is always the quietest part of the stadium. This will allow students to canoodle to their hearts’ content without receiving weird looks from strangers.
“We felt that this was the best location for our wonderful married students, far removed from the hustle and bustle of the actual game,” Holmoe said. “It’s hard enough to watch our lackluster team as is, so what do you expect when you’re sitting in the stadium cuddled up with your eternal companion?”
The list of amenities available to these students is quite expansive. The section will have designated photo spots for couples to take pictures and pick Instagram captions together, such as “we may have lost tonight, but I sure won when I married him.” There will also be changing tables available on both sides of the portal entrance, so husbands and wives will no longer have to fret about missing out on the Costa Vida Wave™ to change their baby’s diaper. The ROC Board did say, however, that all married students will be kicked out of the section at 9 PM to allow them to return home and get to bed early.