BYU Junior Carson Adams has allegedly made thousands of dollars over the past year helping Utah natives hide their true state of residence. For just $200, hundreds of students previously embarrassed of their Provo heritage have been able to cover it up completely by purchasing license plates and documents from their state of choice.

“The most popular one is California, but every once in a while we get someone who thinks they can pull a Hawaii off,” Mr. Adams said, “For the guys who just want to get out of Utah and don’t care where they land we’ve got our budget license plates too: North Dakota, Arkansas, Oregon… you get the picture.”

But Carson’s work doesn’t stop there. With extra payments, dedicated customers can take attend rigorous workshops teaching them how to adapt to their new state identities. Several dozen students gather weekly to practice correctly pronouncing words that would otherwise be a dead-giveaway: mountain, reel, and wash to name a few. Newly assigned Texans work on projecting their voices, while Wisconsinites sample cheeses.

“Really though, for me it’s not about the money.” Carson said at the conclusion of our interview, “I don’t think anyone should have to introduce themself at BYU and say that they’re ‘just’ from Utah.” At press time Mr. Adams was teaching a group of eager Orem residents how to control their desire for fry sauce.