Homemade crystal meth diffuses around Heritage Halls building, students in the vicinity still high

  On February 20th, A Heritage Halls student, who is somehow over the age of 18, formed a methamphetamine cloud while making homemade crystal meth. When University Police arrived, the top floor of the building was cloudy. “We could only see two feet in front of ourselves,” says Joe Bob, BYU’s Chief of Police. “It was an honest mistake. Just make sure to take Chem … Continue reading Homemade crystal meth diffuses around Heritage Halls building, students in the vicinity still high

In Honor of President’s Day: Four Truths and a Lie About President Nelson

What better way to sustain our church leaders and general authorities than by celebrating the holiday made just for them: President’s day! Faithful church members around the world will be celebrating our beloved prophet, President Nelson, all day today. In honor of this great day, here’s four truths and a lie about President Russell M. Nelson. Russell the Wilderness Explorer from the Pixar movie Up … Continue reading In Honor of President’s Day: Four Truths and a Lie About President Nelson

Dark History of 224th Ward Revealed: The Only Ward to Ever Meet in the Testing Center

Because of the sheer amount of BYU student wards, YSA wards meet in almost every building on campus. That is, except for the testing center. However, that was not always the case. Although having been shrouded in mystery for years, the Alternate Universe’s investigative journalism team is finally bringing to light the dark history of the Provo 224th YSA ward. It was a dark and … Continue reading Dark History of 224th Ward Revealed: The Only Ward to Ever Meet in the Testing Center

BYU Returning to Online Classes In Response to Cheese Touch Outbreak

This morning around 9 am, BYU students received the news that all classes will convert to online delivery effective immediately in response to the recent cheese touch outbreak on campus. They say it’s worse than a case of nuclear cooties. It spreads faster than butter on a hot roll, and it can smell fear. With around 5,000 campus cases and counting, the administration was left … Continue reading BYU Returning to Online Classes In Response to Cheese Touch Outbreak

Tabernacle Choir Removes Music From Spotify

Last week, rock musician Neil Young removed his solo collection of music from Spotify. This was in response to COVID-19 misinformation being spread by The Joe Rogan Experience, a podcast owned by Spotify. Several other artists have since followed his example but this Alternate Universe correspondent had never heard of any of them and had too much homework to allow time to find out. So … Continue reading Tabernacle Choir Removes Music From Spotify